Guiding our children spiritually, part 4: the CELLO years

To see this whole series, click below:
Part 1: Guiding our children spiritually intro
Part 2: the VIOLIN years
Part 3: the VIOLA years
Part 4: the CELLO years
Part 5: adding in the academics

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We've looked at the VIOLIN years, from birth to age nine, and the VIOLA years, from age ten to age thirteen. Now we are ready for the mid-teenage years, from age fourteen to seventeen - the CELLO years, during which we will focus on issues of Character and Conviction, Eloquence of expression, Leading with love, Lifelong learning, and O​wnership and obedience.

Character and Conviction

As our children grow more and more toward adulthood, our role with them changes. Just as they have been learning not to coast on our faith, they have to develop their own convictions, hopefully based on the foundation of Scripture we have been helping them establish, and to make decisions that are not just to please us but because of their own Holy Spirit-infused character. We can continue to help them grow in this through conversations about applying Scripture to situations in their lives and through exposure to other believers who have made Christ-honoring decisions in difficult circumstances. They also can practice applying Scriptural principles to real-life situations according to their own convictions.

Eloquence of expression

Our teenagers should be developing their ability to winsomely share their ideas with others, including in matters of faith. While they may have learned how to share the gospel or their testimony during the VIOLA years, this is the time to refine that, becoming more comfortable with speaking to others about their faith, and learning to do it in a way that shows gentleness and respect, but also with firm belief in the truth. In the classical model, the trivium skills of logic and rhetoric come into play in these years.

Leading with love

Leadership is not just for those who have strong personalities or who are gifted speakers. Leadership involves setting an example for those around you, even when everyone else is going the other way. It  involves serving others, following the example of Christ. Even students who are shy and unassuming can be this kind of leader! Providing opportunities for our children to serve others, and to lead others, can build confidence that they will carry into adulthood - and they may surprise us with leadership qualities we didn't see before.

Lifelong learning

Just as we want our children to be able to teach themselves and become more independent academically, they need to learn how to feed themselves spiritually. These are ideal years to move our children from relying on their childhood devotional habits and carefully laid out Bible studies, to planning out their own times of Bible reading and prayer, using more adult study aids.

Ownership and obedience

In these years before they leave home, if they have not already, our children must take ownership for their own faith journey, and make the choice to obey God in all things, apart from our influence, nagging, or pleading. 

Reasoning and release

The CELLO years come under the banner of reasoning and release. In these years, we want to continue to build their confidence in the Scriptures, helping them to reason through them on their own, and also to lead others to reason through them as well. We want to guide them to greater independence in their habits of study, prayer, worship, giving, and serving, and provide them with opportunities to practice their developing leadership skills, as well as outreach and service. While being active in a Christian service group (such as American Heritage Girls or Trail Life USA) or church youth group can help in all of these areas, they should also be given more and more opportunities to participate with adults in the church body, modeling what they can experience in the not-too-distant future when we release them to serve God in the world.

BASS

And this brings us back full circle to our BASS players, our young adults who are hopefully, prayerfully, ready to be launched into the world with a mature belief in Jesus, availability to his call, service to others, and a life of deliberate Holy Spirit-empowered sanctification.

However, I want to say a very clear word about setting goals for our children. This framework is just that - a framework, not a formula. It is not a promise and not a guarantee. It gives some guidance for what how we can focus our children's spiritual learning at different stages, and what we can expect of them (often, more than we realize!). We are called to be faithful with the children God has trusted to us, cultivating an environment that is conducive for healthy spiritual growth to take place. But all growth is from God, and is of grace.

There is one more thing I want to share with you, and that is how these stages of learning, and each corresponding spiritual focus, fit into the larger framework of Classical Christian education. See you tomorrow!