It's October again. You wouldn't know it in the South, where we are still having 80-degree days, but fall is truly here, and Christmas countdowns have legitimately begun.
For me, though, October mostly means pink and blue ribbons as parents of babies in Heaven observe Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Month. If you're on social media of any kind, I'm sure you've seen some of your friends posting about it, or changing their profile picture in honor of it. If you haven't walked this road yourself, you might wonder why it is a big deal, or you might be concerned that your friends are stuck in their grief, and not "moving on".
But nothing can be further from the truth.
For me, though, October mostly means pink and blue ribbons as parents of babies in Heaven observe Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Month. If you're on social media of any kind, I'm sure you've seen some of your friends posting about it, or changing their profile picture in honor of it. If you haven't walked this road yourself, you might wonder why it is a big deal, or you might be concerned that your friends are stuck in their grief, and not "moving on".
But nothing can be further from the truth.
Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Month isn't really about collective grief, even though what draws the baby loss community together is the tragic loss of our children. It is about collective remembrance. It is the one month out of the year when it feels okay - or more okay than normal - to talk about the children who aren't here. This one month, we can remember them out loud, and we can encourage our friends to remember them, too. We can also let others in our club know that it's okay for them to remember their child out loud.
I say "out loud" because, honestly, you never forget. It's been nine and a half years since my daughter Naomi passed into eternity. I remember that day as clearly as if it were yesterday, and not a day goes by that I don't think of her, or her other siblings who flew to Heaven in the years since. That doesn't mean I'm "stuck" or that my days are without joy - not at all! But how can I forget the children I carried, who are part of me, and who have made me the person I am today?
And so I'm thankful for this month, for the chance to share with others the significance of the brief lives of our babies, and for the chance to remember them, out loud.
Because I will never forget.
Are you part of this club? Would you do me the honor of remembering your baby or babies in the comments below so that I can rejoice with you in the meaning their lives had, however brief they were?
I say "out loud" because, honestly, you never forget. It's been nine and a half years since my daughter Naomi passed into eternity. I remember that day as clearly as if it were yesterday, and not a day goes by that I don't think of her, or her other siblings who flew to Heaven in the years since. That doesn't mean I'm "stuck" or that my days are without joy - not at all! But how can I forget the children I carried, who are part of me, and who have made me the person I am today?
And so I'm thankful for this month, for the chance to share with others the significance of the brief lives of our babies, and for the chance to remember them, out loud.
Because I will never forget.
Are you part of this club? Would you do me the honor of remembering your baby or babies in the comments below so that I can rejoice with you in the meaning their lives had, however brief they were?
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